BEST OF BULLDOG

Brauny The Strowman

Originally published December 9, 2019

For more than a decade, Canadian Bulldog has been composing off-beat, quirky Christmas Carols for the offbeat, quirky world of pro wrestling. Here's another one...

Brauny The Strowman

Brauny The Strowman

Was an angry, brooding soul

With his pants all weird, and a ratty beard

Called a monster by Michael Cole

 

Brauny The Strowman

Made the children run away

And weren’t they surprised when

Before their eyes

He lifted up a Chevrolet

 

There must have been some magic

When he killed James Ellsworth dead

For when he pinned that jobber

They started pushing him instead

 

Oh! Brauny The Strowman

Lived a life without regret

He squashed all his foes, from heads to toes,

Said “I’m not finished with you yet.”

 

Brauny The Strowman

With his hand curled in a fist

He told all his fans that “You’ll get these hands”

Yelling “BRAUN!” like he was pissed

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