GR Flexforce Ultimate Warrior Power

Right off the bat, you may notice a few interesting things about the GR FlexForce Ultimate Warrior Power action figure gift set. For one thing, The Ultimate Warrior isn't part of it (nor is any other actual wrestler, though a few come pretty close). Second, it's not based on the "FlexForce" series of action figures by Mattel in the early 2010s, even though the logo is identical.

This, my friends, is the bootleggiest bootleg that ever bootlegged. It's the wrestling equivalent of those superhero sets that you may find in a flea market, with really poor renditions of Superman, SpiderMan and, I dunno, Shrek packaged together for no discernable reason. But as atrocious as the entire set may seem to be, there's actually quite a bit to it. Let's take a closer look, shall we?

The box art itself is a thing of beauty, particularly with the multiple broken English phrases all over it. This includes a cartoon of The Rock (not included in this set) saying "Come on!!" and a note that encourages users to "Try Me! Play With Me I Will Give You Infinite Happiness" as well as the helpful instructions to "Be filled with the tournament stage of intense emotion!" This set also purports to be a "Toy Model of a Virtual Reality" and be a "FIGHTING Hero," whatever the hell that means.

The back of the box shows a variety of cheap action figures doing battle, including bootleg versions of Chris Jericho, The Undertaker and Batista... none of which are included in the set. Instead, here's who you get:

  • Roy Mystereo Junior: A distant cousin of WWE star Rey Mysterio, this competitor wears a reasonable facsimile of the high-flyer's mask, trunks and tattoos, except that it says "LEJ RE" across his stomach where "MEXICAN" would traditionally be. According to his trunks, he's also the master of the "679" which, according to my research, is an inactive area code. It's also worth noting that this figure is taller than all but one of the other wrestler including...

  • The Large Red Machine Cain: The facial resemblance to WWE Hall of Famer Kane is admirable, as are the pattern on his trunks. Unfortunately, The Devil's Second-Favorite Demon failed to shave the back of his head and of course, he doesn't exactly tower over his opponents the way Kane may.

  • Andy Rorton: "The Legend Murderer" isn't a terrible rendering of a younger Randy Orton, if you discount the rush job on all his tattoos, the indistinguishable writing on his trunks (seriously, I've read it over five times and still have no idea what it says), and his slightly off-putting hairline.

  • Double H: This one is kind of laughable, as it captures the kind of, sort of face of Cerebral Assassin-era Triple H and pairs it with silver boxer shorts with a logo that kind of, sort of looks like the symbol around Batista's navel.

The figures are semi-poseable, but made of a cheap plastic that could snap apart at any moment. Their thumbs also bend perilously whenever you attempt to have them hold any of the foreign objects available to you through the GR FlexForce Ultimate Warrior Power set, including:

  • A chainsaw, perfect for... cutting the limbs of your opponents clean off the bone?

  • A ladder... er, stepladder that can barely support the weight of a single wrestler

  • A chair that somewhat bends but because the wrestlers don't, won't allow any of the competitors to sit on it, which of course is the whole POINT of a chair!

  • Two barbells of unequal size. The smaller of which looks to be of a 2.5 pound variety; something that your grandmother might have in her exercise room

  • A crutch that can't truly be held by any of the wrestlers; nor is it long enough to walk on

  • A microphone/mace like object that could possibly be a sex toy of some strain

In addition to these foreign objects, you also have a ring; something that is pretty standard for bootleg sets such as these; flimsy as hell, but hey, it gets the job done.

With all of this in one kit (retail price: $20), it's truly enough to let you feel the power - the GR FlexForce Ultimate Warrior Power!

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