BEST OF BULLDOG
Million Dollar Corporation
Launches Bid To Buy WWE
Originally published January 14, 2023
(Seasonal Residences) - The Million Dollar Corporation is said to be launching a bid to take over World Wrestling Entertainment, sources say.
The Million Dollar Corporation (NYSE: $$$), last seen making wrestling-based investments nearly 30 years ago, apparently has endless resources to spend on the beleaguered sports entertainment brand, said a source who asked not to be identified as Tatanka.
Oops, that should read "a source who asked not to be identified" full stop. Forget the Tatanka part.
Million Dollar Corp. Chief Executive Ted DiBiase has deep ties to WWE, once trying to purchase the world's championship, apparently by cloning a trusted referee. He also once made Rob Van Dam kiss his bare feet. Still, the former Million Dollar Champion was coy about any acquisition plans.
"Some might cost a little," DiBiase recently said at a press conference from his home in the Netherlands, Antilles. "Some might cost a lot. But I'm the Million Dollar Man. And you can all be bought!"
"Ahahahahahahaha!" he continued.
If the group ultimately decides to make a bid, they may be competing with other interested parties including The York Foundation, The Billionaire's Club and, for some reason, Maximum Male Models.
"At the end of the day, it doesn't matter because DiBiase has the resources to buy them all out," our source explained. "Yee yee yee yee yee yee! Yee Yee Yee Yee!"