The First Lady of Wrestling
Missy Hyatt with Charles Salzberg and Mark Goldblatt
Synopsis: A controversial tell-all from 80s and 90s manager Missy Hyatt.
Let me tell you something about Ric Flair. The guy's a perv. We're talking Marv Albert City here. First of all, he's got a thing about pubic hair. He loves it. He won't have sex with a woman who shaves. His saying used to be, "No hair, no Flair."
Flair's main thing, though, was that he always wanted to show women his penis. Publicists. Make-up and wardrobe people. Waitressess. Department store clerks. Travel agents. Bank tellers.
I mean, it wasn't even so much a sex thing. It was a perv thing. He's just always liked showing off his penis - though, frankly, I've seen it dozens of times, and it's nothing to write home about. I mean, basically, it just looks like Ric Flair's penis, like the kind of penis he would have. Put a bleached-blong wig on it, and it would look like him. Whoooo!
I realize most people are expecting me to crap all over this book, given the juicy tell-all nature of the book. But Missy Hyatt: First Lady Of Wrestling has a unique, trashy charm to it that honestly stops me from said crapping.
Don't get me wrong: Missy often comes across just as ditzy and superficial as her WCW character was back in the day. But there's also the side of her that demonstrates a ton of wrestling psychology; stuff that many female wrestlers could stand to learn today.
Hyatt talks at length about her relationship with the late Eddie Gilbert, which ended tragically but shows how much they cared about each other during their marriage. Plus there's the story of her (very brief) WWF run - betcha never knew that she'd been penciled in as Roddy Piper's replacement?
Of course, that's not the reason most people read a book about Missy Hyatt. This book is chock-full of kiss-and-tell tales (and often, more than just kissing) that's trashy and funny at the same time. Guests at Missy's Manor (and we're not talking about the talk show) reads like a Hall of Fame; she's allegedly had dalliances with Road Warrior Hawk, Jake Roberts, Brutus Beefcake, Dr. Tom Pritchard, Val Venis, hockey player Rob Brind'Amour, football players Bill Fralic and Jim Kelly, Wonder Years star Jason Hervey... even Ted Turner apparently hit on her.
None of these stories are really out of the realm of possibility (particularly if you saw what she looked like in the early-to-mid 1980's), but they're presented in a fun and mostly harmless way. Missy knows exactly who she is and doesn't really try to hide it.
Rating: Bowling-Shoe Ugly. I'd be lying if I said this was for everyone, but it's definitely a guilty pleasure, and much like Missy comes across, the read is quite easy.