25 Things You Never Knew About SummerSlam

(Probably because they're not true)

Originally published August 13, 2013

What's up, kids? Feeling all summery? Feeling all slammy? That last question shouldn't be confused with the question "Have you won a Slammy?", which, in my case, happens to be true. The Notorious D.O.G. is, in fact, a two-time Slammy award winner, capturing the 'Best Buns' honor in 1996 and co-winning for 'Best Bow Tie' a year later.

Speaking of shit I've made up.... it's time for you stupid marks to learn 25 facts about SummerSlam that you haven't heard before. Possibly because they don't exist. And to sweeten the pot a bit, I have re-imagined 25 classic SummerSlam posters much the way I did with WrestleMania a few years back. Enjoy!

2) In an attempt to curtail SummerSlam's popularity, WCW presented in 1991 a three-hour special on Superstation TBS that more or less centered around El Gigante making out with Johnny B. Badd.

4) Tito Santana is the only person to wrestle all twenty-six Summerslams. Last year, he did so using the alias "Cody Rhodes."

6) The couch used at ringside by The Mean Street Posse during 1999's "Love Her Or Leave Her" match between Test and Shane McMahon is today worth over $350 million.

8) The real reason behind the disappointing countout finish in the 1993 Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna WWF title match? Yoko needed a nap after gorging himself silly on the pre-SummerSlam buffet. 

10) After winning the Million Dollar Belt from Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase at SummerSlam 91, Wrestling Superstar Virgil went to a baseball card show in Encino and hawked it for $30.

12) The proposed finish to the match between Hulk Hogan and Randy Orton at SummerSlam 2006 was to have The Legend Killer crap in Brooke Hogan's gym bag.

1) The event's name was blatantly stolen by a hungover Captain Lou Albano in late-1987 as he read over the Denny's menu. The 'Summer Slam' was three pancakes, summer sausage, toast, eggs and your choice of hash browns or home fries.

3) Contrary to popular belief, The Mountie did not spend the night in a New York prison after losing to The Big Boss Man in 1991. It was more like six hours.

5) The original main event penciled in to help fill Wembley Stadium in 1992 ("The SummerSlam you thought you'd never see!") was Davey Boy Smith and Manchester United versus Bret "Hit Man" Hart and the Toronto Argonauts.

7) To placate the rising number of WCW fans at the time, the main event of SummerSlam 1998 was supposed to end with a screwjob finish, complete with Jim Ross screaming "Folks, we're out of time. Tune in on Raw tomorrow night to find out what happened!"

9) SummerSlam 95 opened with Barry Horowitz vs. Bodydonna Skip because the World Wrestling Federation didn't want anyone to order the PPV.

11) Everyone who appeared at the inaugural SummerSlam in 1988 mysteriously died the following day.

13) While Leslie Nielsen and George Kennedy weren't able to crack case of the Missing Undertaker at SummerSlam 94, they were able to prevent Queen Elizabeth from being assassinated by Reggie Jackson.

14) Before it was replaced by Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Triple H vs. Mankind with Jesse The Body Ventura as guest referee, Vince Russo had proposed that the main event of SummerSlam 1999 be Droz vs. Chyna in a flaming barbed wire evening gown match.

16) Somewhat shockingly, neither Lou Thesz nor George Hackenschmidt ever wrestled at SummerSlam.

18) The reason Shawn Michaels wore blue jeans to his Streetfight with Triple H at SummerSlam 2002 was because his blouse and mirrored chaps were at the dry cleaners.

20) At SummerSlam 2005, Eddie Guerrero was to win custody of Dominick Mysterio had he climbed the ladder first. If he lost, he got custody of Chavo Guerrero.

15) Before selecting Daniel Bryan as his final partner for the Team WWE vs. The Nexus match, John Cena was "seriously considering" Jonathan Coachman.

17) If Vince McMahon had his way, the Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake versus Macho Man Randy Savage and Zeus main event of SummerSlam 89 would have also been the final match in his proposed screenplay for No Holds Barred II: Rip Harder.

19) Bret Hart has faced more family members at SummerSlam than anyone in history. He battled brother-in-law Davey Boy Smith in 1992; brother Owen Hart in 1994; mother Helen Hart in 1997; and son Blade Hart in a 2011 dark match.

21) If it weren't for The Ultimate Warrior, the wrestler who would have accepted The Honky Tonk Man's open challenge at SummerSlam 88 would have been Siva Afi.

22) While urban legend has it that Mr. Perfect was shot up with tons of painkillers to hang in there for his SummerSlam 91 match with Bret Hart, the truth is he avoided injury by wearing a fake back.

23) The individual who has main-evented more SummerSlams than anyone else? Jimmy Uso.

24) Instead of tables, ladders and chairs (oh my!), the TLC match between The Dudley BoyzMatt and Jeff Hardy and Edge and Christian at SummerSlam 2000 was supposed to feature Lisa "Left Eye" LopesRozonda "Chilli" Thomas and Tionne "T-Boz" Watkins as weapons.

25) The Evil Undertaker was actually Bam Bam Bigelow under a mask.

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